Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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