When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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